CQM Blog: Concepts That Build Christ-Likeness

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Marriage | Knowing the Differences Between Dating and Marriage

Mr. Wonderful

Have you ever wondered… Whatever happened to the guy you were dating? He was once your Mr. Wonderful, but now he’s Mr. Disappointment by Nancy Nair

Something happens to us girls at the time we start dating a guy. We think, “Wouldn’t it be great to be married to this wonderful guy for the rest of our lives? We will be in love forever, our marriage will be the greatest and we will have the most wonderful children.” However, once it goes from dating to marriage something changes.

Dating to a man means something completely different. It’s not dating to him; it’s trying to conquer something and the “something” is winning you over. Yes, he does enjoy you and when he says I love you , he truly believes he does. However, without knowing it, a man puts on a show causing us to believe he is “Mr. Wonderful”. You start believing he is a charming and sensitive man. But remember he is trying to win you over, hoping when he can pop the famous words, “Will you marry me?” that you will say yes. Then once he becomes your husband, he’s accomplished his goal… you are now HIS for the rest of your life.

Since there is no need for him to play the role of “Mr. Wonderful” anymore, he changes his task to providing for the family instead of being charming and sensitive to you. You no longer feel taken care of or like you are his special girlfriend.

To keep the bills paid he starts working long hours, coming home late, becomes exhausted and is too tired to have time for you.

Since your spirit and other needs aren’t being taken care of, you begin sharing with him how he is making you feel. This makes him irritated because he feels that he is taking care of you; but he is taking care of you physically not spiritually. The talks and arguments turn him into a completely different man, furthering the emotional distance from you and him. There is so much stress and seemingly no help.