Our Christmas Gift From God by Nancy Nair
It is the Christmas Season and there will be some gifts given to me. I think about myself opening up this beautiful gift that someone has spent lots of time looking for; just to show me they love me. Can you imagine me taking that gift and putting it in my room and not giving it a second thought about how to use that gift for maybe 5 or 10 years? Now, after 10 year, I take the time to sit down and really look at it. That’s what I had done to God’s gift. It was such a special gift. It has taken me such a long time to really understand what He had in mind for me when He gave me that gift. Actually, He placed that gift within me. I can just imagine the joy in His heart when he placed that gift inside me at birth. And how sad He must have been that there was no one around to explain to me that I had this gift. Not knowing, I didn’t open that gift for years
Finally, when I took the Spiritual Gifts Evaluation, my highest score was in the gift of Mercy. I should have been more curious about what I needed to know about that gift. I have wasted so many years of the blessings that gift could have been to me. Because I didn’t understand it and because I didn’t know to ask any questions about it, the gift didn’t get developed as God intended. So, it got used negatively.
But, God wouldn’t just give me a gift for no reason; He would want me to use it for Him. Isn’t that wonderful that He would do that for me? I do so love the Lord for giving me this gift. That’s why now, I am determined to learn all I can about it. There is the positive side on how this gift should be used. Then, there is the negative side. And, I seemed to have fallen into the negative so much of the time. One of those negative sides that I seem to be very familiar with is WORRY. I battle that all the time. I battle it because I know that misusing His gift hurts Him. It also causes so much stress in others. So, I don’t want to be in that worry mode. When I am going about my day, if I stay in the negative side of my gift it causes me to think only of me. That’s a bad place for me to be, because I can’t think of others when I’m in my worry mode. Sad to say, but it was really a very easy place for me to be, before I learned how God intended me to use the His gift. One of the main reasons why I worried was because I was trying to protect myself. It took me a long time to stop being so protective of myself. I got pretty good at it, but once in a while it creeps back in there. But now, I have the tools to look at it, and not stay in that selfish mode. There are other negative areas about that gift I need to work on, so, I still have pay attention.
I am working really hard to be where God has intended me to be. I remember one situation as I was growing up that has always stuck in my mind. My sister’s and I were playing a table game and we were really into that game. I was enjoying it until I saw that I wasn’t going to win. Wow that protection mode showed up in me and I decided I would just mess up the game, so we couldn’t play the game any more. Did I think about how my sister’s were enjoying the game? No, because I was into making myself happy. I don’t remember if I got in trouble for that or not but I should have. I can still feel that protection of myself rise to the surface to this day. If I would have known at the time what God wanted me to be, maybe I would have reacted differently to that game. I wish that I could have laughed, and enjoyed one of them winning. I see that as a big loss for me, to not have enjoyed the game with them. Now that I have grown up, I believe I have gotten better, but that protection of self often shows up. When I look back at the game with my sister’s I wonder how my sister’s could still love me, because I’m sure it wasn’t the only time I did that to them. I’m sure my mother tried to talk to me about that self protection mode. But, I couldn’t or I should say I wouldn’t talk about it because I might be wrong and I never wanted to say I was wrong. It was always someone else’s fault, not mine. So I never learned to deal with my faults because my thinking was, I am such a nice person, why would you want to think poorly of me. Again if I would have known about the positive side of my gift, I would have accepted my blame. I would have ended up being a winner.
This reminds me of something I said while I was talking with God that shocked me. Because I was always a quiet person, and didn’t think anything was wrong with me. Also, I was always trying to help everyone else if I saw them hurting. I thought, as I was praying to God, I wonder why Christ died for me. I sure don’t have any sins in my life. Look at me, I’m always trying to make things right. It was like a bolt of lightning coming at me. I thought, WOW, who do I think I am!?! That thinking alone was cause enough for Jesus to have died for me! That was a very important day of my life. Now, I thank Jesus all the time for dying for me. How wonderful He is, and how wonderful God is to give up His only begotten son for me. What more could I ask for.
Here’s some of the special abilities I discovered God placed within the gift of Mercy: 1. Very considerate of other’s feelings 2. Able to visualize causes and effects on other’s emotions. 3. Excellent memory for special dates, occasions and other personal preferences. 4. Alert to areas of social injustice. 5. Able to remain in the background in silence. 6. Attracted to those who need help.
Here’s what I have to watch out for, because they are the areas for concern: 1. Projects irrational fears. 2. Assumes negative motives in others. 3. Fear of rejection may cause violation of convictions. 4. Closes their spirit to those that feel are insensitive. 5. Has poor self image. 6. Calculates vengeance when wounded.