CQM Blog: Concepts That Build Christ-Likeness

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Marriage | Understanding and Encouragement in Relationships

Listen to my Heart by Nancy Nair

When life seems like there is no way out and you have done as much as you can to change the situation (whatever that situation is and there are a lot of them) you need someone to come along side you and listen to you. I know that when I was trying to let Ken see how much he had hurt me and the children I just needed for him to understand how he had hurt us. When I shared and he didn’t hear what I was saying it left me without hope. 

I needed someone to listen to me share my heart. I needed a friend who would not try to fix it or take up an offense against Ken when I was sharing my deepest hurts. It is hard to find someone who will just let you talk even when you say things that you later wish you wouldn’t have said. It’s like I needed some gas to fill my tank so that I could go back and share it a different way. It wasn’t that Ken didn’t want to hear, it was that I was not sharing it in a way that he could understand and I needed encouragement to keep going. Now I know that there are some husbands who really don’t want to hear and this wife will need encouragement to go on in a different way. We all need encouragement to keep on going.

I wish that I would have written in a journal and placed it on the kitchen table for Ken, available for him to read my thoughts. This would be a place where the children could have access to write their thoughts in it as well. So many times, women will write in a journal and hide it (which serves no purpose). Never let a day go by that you have not shared your thoughts, either verbally or written in your journal. When a woman doesn’t share her thoughts and feelings, she can replay the hurts over and over again in her mind. It can be because she hasn’t spoken them and Satan really wants turmoil to happen.

While reading my Bible, I find many verses that inspire, motivate and give me strength. Right now, I love what Philippians 2:1-16 says to me. You probably have your own verses that give you strength as you read them each day.  We all need to fill ourselves with the Word of God because that is the way we hold onto Him for our strength.