CQM Blog: Concepts That Build Christ-Likeness

Tools for those in serious pursuit

Relationship Help | Looking Good on the Outside


It has never occurred to most people to ask themselves if their marriage is suffering from Emotional Divorce.  Mostly we think there is only one kind of divorce: “legal divorce.”  That is why it’s easy for a person to think, “If I stay together in this marriage and do not go through the legal system, I am not guilty of divorce.”  That thinking makes it easier for Emotional Divorce to exist within, and be very dangerous to a marriage relationship.

Emotional Divorce is detected through negative attitudes; even unexpressed secret attitudes towards one’s spouse, existing deep down in their thoughts.  Those attitudes developed ever so slowly, over a period of years, and they exist as unchallenged enemies, eventually destroying marriages, families and homes.

If unrecognized and unchallenged, what person would you think to ask themself the question, “Is Emotional Divorce ungodly?”  Nevertheless, every secret thought or attitude deep within the heart of a person that is not a godly thought (even if it remains only an unfamiliar or secret thought), is just as offensive to God as if it were acted out.

Being familiar with godliness is not normal to human beings.  The Apostle Paul states he would not have known what sin was, nor would he have known he was a sinner, were it not shown to him by God’s laws (see Romans 7:7-20.)

Until shown differently, most people will not experience much conviction over mere thoughts.   That is why Jesus revealed that thoughts or attitudes within a person’s heart are just as significant to God as a person’’ physical actions.

Jesus’ own words are proof that our inner-most secret thoughts or attitudes are of great significance: