We would like to share a testimony from 4/3/88 written by a wife who thought there was no hope in their marriage. Hopefully this can be an encouragement to those whose marriage might be “hanging on by a thin branch” as well.
Dear Ken and Nancy,
How do you adequately tell someone thank you for offering you a hand when you are over a cliff and hanging on by a thin branch? Ken thank you for meeting with us on Wednesday evening. We were and are facing a pretty scary and uncertain crossroad in our marriage. Thank you for directing us lovingly back to our heavenly Father. My husband has come a long way and God loves him so much that He won’t let him fall short of coming to the best place for he and our family.
I can’t explain just how beat up and discouraged we were that day but, I know you know! You have a beautiful way of relating to my husband. You gently guided him and caused him to think about what God is trying to teach him and he was able to receive it from you. You have a gift when it comes to helping men get to a better place. You see their worth and value just like Jesus would. I can honestly say that I have never seen anyone relate to my husband like you do.
He came away from our time with you with some healing. He was encouraged; he in turn could lead me to a better place. He is at a place now where he can surrender more easily to what God is asking him to do.
Ken and Nancy, because you care for him in Christ, I am asking for you to pray for him. I know the journey is the same for every man only the test along the way might be different. You have been so incredibly Christ-like, generous, encouraging, consistent, not critical or judgmental. We want to thank you.
My husband grew up with parents that were all about conditional love. His father was a rage-aholic. He got his worth from his possessions and his successes since he had been abused when he was a kid. This caused him to be dishonest, verbally abusive; withholding any complements along with physical demonstrations of love. He never knew what love really was. His father treated his mother with little or no value, lying to her self-centeredly using his family as he tried to get ahead; never caring who he hurt on his way up. As he watched he was also learning.
Then he came to Christ when he was sixteen through Young Life. But I truly don’t think he came to know the Jesus who is warm and nurturing that would hold him and comfort him. I think Ken, in a way you are showing him the side of Jesus. He respects you. He may not want to humble himself always and come to see you, still he is watching, and learning.
Thank you for your commitment to our marriage. We hope God can richly bless you in everything.