In talking with women, I have continued to hear something that is very concerning. It seems like women are confused about what their role in a marriage is. No one has taught them that they have a “job” that God gave them when they got married. I love to speak with young girls when they are thinking about getting married about this subject.
For example, I was talking with a lady this week. As we talked, she shared how she feels trapped. She was being so abused verbally by her husband. It was interesting that he only spoke abusively to her when no one was around. I could hear defeat in her voice and I asked her, “Do you have any money at all to do something fun?” She shared with me that she had a lot of children, so there was no time to go and have fun. As she continued talking, she shared that the children were upset at her as well. Their dad was always loving and kind to them; they couldn’t understand why she was always hurting. She spent many hours crying and the children couldn’t understand why. She tried to share with them about their dad’s verbal abuse to her, but they didn’t believe her.
My heart was grieved that there was no one who believed her. She was all alone with a very hurt heart. Can you just imagine no place to go…no mother to talk with, no sisters or brothers to talk with and by this time her friends were tired of hearing her hurts. They didn’t see any physical signs of being hurt. TRAPPED is where she lived and no one to help her.
This leaves me wondering; is there really no one who will just listen with a woman who is in need no matter how long it takes? That is the help she needs, because as she speaks all the things he is doing to her with no judgment from whoever she is talking with she will feel loved. Once she can feel someone loves her, she can start thinking about what she needs to do. Once she is out of the TRAP, she will be able to ask for help. Before that she just needed someone to believe in her.
She was not in any danger to be killed physically, but she was in danger of being killed spiritually. THAT GIVES NO HOPE TO A PERSON.
If only I had the funds to sit and listen to women all day long, only giving her someone to talk with (but not giving advice until she asked). I would love that. It would keep her from getting sick; which is what usually happens to someone with no hope.